An incredible talent... an incredible loss

Every so often a song grabs hold of me and won't let go. And I know I am way behind the times here since The Lion King has been on stage since 1997, but I saw it for the first time last month in London. During the play, I heard a song that I didn't remember being associated with the movie, and it just knocked my socks off, moving me to tears. I finally remembered to look for it this week on iTunes, and I learned there were two versions of the song: the first was Mafusa (the elder Lion King father) singing They Live in You to a young Simba, his son. The second was a reprise where the mandrill Rafiki is singing to an adult Simba the version, He Lives in You.

The reprise reminds me of a gospel song-- "He lives in you, he lives in me, he watches over everything we see, into the water, into the truth, in your reflection, he lives in you." It mentions "have faith, and there's no mountain too great." Sounds like the lyric writer knew Christ. The writer/composer credits to this song goes to three men: Lebo M, Mark Marcina, and Jay Rifkin, all very talented musicians.

I found several YouTube versions of the songs, and my favorite was from a segment of Rosie O'Donnell's show that aired in 1997 with the original cast members. They combined both versions of the song. Here is the link if you'd like to take a look:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ryhslEPIUH0

Samuel Wright as Mufasa has the most amazingly rich voice-- perfect for the older Lion King, and Tsidii Le Loka as Rafiki does a fantastic job in her role, but the performance that blew me away was Jason Raize as the older Simba singing only a few lines at the end of the song.

http://www.jasonraize.net/

I have watched a number of other Simba performers in clips since them, and the London actor I saw was outstanding, but Jason owns the role. And his performance on the Rosie O'Donnell show was so much better than his recorded version of the reprise from the "official" theater cast album. I guess there's just something about performing in front of a live audience that pulls the best out of some people. I was keenly aware that I was watching something very special and someone very gifted, and I would have loved to have seen him perform in The Lion King or any other production. Wow.

Then I read some of the comments by viewers and was shocked to learn that Jason had committed suicide back in 2004, and I haven't been able to shake the sadness for days. And the fact that he somehow lost his way and his friends and family didn't seem to have a clue that he was troubled is especially disheartening. Maybe he wasn't. Are they sure it was a suicide? I have found a lot of news reports from that time that all seem to say the same thing, but they actually say very little. And I found no comments from his peers and the people he knew and worked with. What am I missing here? Maybe I just didn't dig deep enough.

I downloaded Samuel Wright's recording of They Live in You, as well as one of the song's composers Lebo M's version, and also Tsidii Le Loka and Jason's reprise, He Lives in You, all of which I've listened to over and over again the past few days. And I keep going back to watch the YouTube combination of both songs-- my favorite. I love to watch Jason sing those few lines with everything he's got. It makes me want to put that kind of effort into something creative and worthwhile... something that will last beyond me.

I'm so, so sorry Jason's life ended way too early. What an incredible talent and an irreplaceable loss to his family and friends, and incredible loss to his many fans, even late-comers like me.

A New Path

On my original blog, http://blog.donnavancleve.com/ , I'm currently journaling my recent trip to London. We took our time while we were there, but it was still hard to soak it all in. I remember feeling like I wanted to re-invent myself while I was there. And circumstances at home have contributed to that. My position as school librarian was done away with, but it wasn't a stressful loss because I wanted and needed to be home helping take care of my mom who is in her 41st month of ALS/Lou Gehrig's disease. She lost her ability to speak over a year ago, but she can still communicate through writing & hand signals. She walks with a walker now, and only for short distances. We use a portable push wheelchair when we need to. We applied for a power wheelchair, but were denied because she is still walking some. The disease is progressive, though, and unless God chooses to miraculously heal her, she will eventually be in a wheelchair when out of her bed during the day. 

Gangy holding her most recent great-grandson August

Her throat and lungs are our biggest concern because this type of ALS paralyzes the tongue and the ability to swallow as well as weakens the function of her lungs to breath and to clear them. She gets the majority of her nourishment from liquid supplements fed through a stomach tube, but she still eats some soft foods, which increases her chances of choking. She's faithful to do what the doctors tell her; she wears a vest that vibrates her chest to loosen anything that might be collecting in her lungs; she wears a mask at night that helps force air into her lungs; and she received a new machine this week that will help her cough and clear her lungs. 

My parents and I on the porch of our new house, November 2009, five months before Mom's symptoms began

Mom is a trooper, though. She never complains or feels sorrow for herself. If she's able to do something herself, she'll do it. Her sense of humor is intact. She is the most selfless and courageous person I know, constantly thinking of others. She has the best memory in the house, and keeps my dad and me straight. My heart breaks for her and what lies ahead, but we try to focus on the good and not the bad. We're thankful that she's not in any pain. We're thankful that she can still communicate with us. We're thankful this disease didn't strike years ago. We're thankful that the dog she bought me for my birthday loves her the most and stays beside her throughout the day. He's brought her such joy and laughter, although he isn't without his own issues.

Snickers in his centerfold pose

Snickers was a part of the 140+ dogs living in a hoarding situation in Bastrop last year that has been in the news off and on. He's deaf and has poor eyesight. He has severe separation anxiety issues and tends to tear things up when he's by himself. He was adopted twice and returned twice. But he has the most loving heart and sweetest personality, and it didn't take him long to steal our hearts. 

Hot wheels grandmas in San Antonio with Mom, Nelda Watson, & Mary Blood

Looking back we see so clearly that God's hand has been guiding us and providing for us, especially in moving my parents to Central Texas closer to doctors and hospitals. And I have no doubt He led us to the house we're living in, which is such a good fit for us in so many ways. We're so thankful for His love and care, and it's such a comfort knowing that He will guide us through the days to come and give us the strength and grace to travel this path.