Ramping it Up

Thanks to the encouragement and help of my sweet sister-in-law, Mary Ellen Casey, we started building the wheelchair ramp that extends off our back deck. My brother Joe and their two sons Kyle and Lance also helped out that weekend. My father was the chief engineer and did the bulk of the work afterwards. I mainly slapped paint on here and there.

Three days after we started, I received a call that Mom's motorized wheelchair would be delivered the next day. Our claim had been denied by Medicare because Mom was still walking with a walker, but ALS is progressive and we knew that time was coming. The very week we started on the ramp, she had two bad falls, the second one meant five stitches in her forehead, so we knew she was getting close to needing that wheelchair. We were building the ramp to accommodate a light-weight push wheelchair.

I'm going to have to work on Dad's picture posing.

Someone must have gone to bat for mom for her to receive the motorized wheelchair, and we're still trying to figure that out so we can thank them. But since the ramp would now need to hold 350 lbs. of chair and person, Dad had to add more braces, and he added 4x4 posts all along the sides to accommodate the extra weight. 

He looks like he's in time out or something

When Mom and Dad move to a new community, one of the first things they do is join a church. Then they look around to see how they can become involved in worthwhile projects. They volunteered one day a week at the local food bank, and Mom also volunteered one afternoon a week at the local hospital gift shop, which supports the hospital. Mom's speech began to deteriorate, but she could still write if people couldn't understand her. When her usual partner had to stay home to take care of her husband, her new partner was definitely orchestrated by God. Mom learned that her new partner's husband also had ALS, so Mazie was not in the least bit uncomfortable with Mom's  condition. Even after Mom had to retire from the hospital job, Mazie has continued to keep up with us, and even checked on Mom and Dad while I was in London. We appreciate her friendship so much.  

For the smaller ramp into the garage,  fellow ALS caregiver, Mazie Rosipal, 

let us use the ramp  her husband previously used at their house. 

Now the ramp is almost finished. We just need to add strips of 1x4s to the lower part of each side to keep the wheels from driving off the sides of the ramp. The wheelchair control is very sensitive, and it unnerved me trying to keep it in the middle of the ramp as I drove it into the house for Mom. 

I'm convinced that God put us in this house and this town at this time of our lives. He knew what was ahead for us, and it's comforting to know that He's gone before us. I know this ramp is another milestone with ALS, and it means everything's getting harder, especially for Mom. And when we feel so helpless watching ALS take its toll, doing things like building the ramp lets us feel like, if only for a moment, that we're helping and making things easier for her. But I cling to what Jesus' brother James wrote: He gives greater grace, grace that can overcome this disease and all of its heartrending ramifications.

I dedicated my fifth novel, The Last Key, to my mother, and included the following words:

For my mother, Isla,

whose eyes first saw this story;

My best and worst attempts at anything in life

find safe harbor with you,

along with my pieced and quilted heart.

I love your intelligence & humor & generosity;

You've taught me so much

by how you've lived your life,

more so than words;

Much more so than words.

I still see you vibrant & beautiful,

and that won't change,

even when our roles reverse;

You've always been strong for us;

It's our turn now to be strong for you.

I still hear you,

I've not forgotten your voice;

It lives in my memories,

and there it will remain

until it's perfectly restored on the other side.

I love hanging out with you,

even in the storms.

No matter who gets there first,

remember our date by the gate;

And until then, I'll walk side by side with you.

We'll all walk side by side with you, Gangy.

From 3rd Person to 1st Person

One church in our area advertises that they still sing hymns. Another church boasts that attendees wouldn't see an organ or piano in their church-- I think the line included, "This ain't your mother's church," or something of the sort. The great divide that exists between the two musical styles of hymns seems to run along age differences and/or "the raised in the church" bunch versus "the new to the church attendees."

Some churches have almost split, or at least lost membership when the church chose one style of music over the other. Personally, I like a worship service that retains its musical heritage and embraces new hymns of worship-- melding the two. That way no one is excluded when it comes to worship that is meaningful to everyone.

As a young adult, I was tired of the old hymns and wanted our church services to use more contemporary hymns. When I used to sing with a contemporary gospel group, I remember seeing an older feller in the back of the church with his fingers plugging his ears while we sang.

I didn't appreciate the old hymns, though, until I thought I'd lost them. When I moved to the Austin area some years back, I visited a number of churches that sang ONLY contemporary songs, many of which I'd never heard. During Sunday morning worship in one church I sat behind a woman in a halter top and shorts, and she didn't look like a first time visitor. Half the congregation was drinking coffee in the worship service, and the worship leader was wearing cargo shorts. I understand that many contemporary churches today are wanting unchurched people to feel comfortable attending church, but I really didn't feel like we were worshiping God there. It seemed like the focus was more on meeting man's comfort. And if we can't set aside our caffeine intake for only one hour to focus on worshipping our Lord and Savior, are we preaching an easy believe-ism that means we'll fit God into our lives only if it's convenient and comfortable?

I visited church after church that only offered contemporary, casual worship, and I found myself craving the old hymns, which actually surprised me. I finally found a small church that still sang hymns, and I began to listen to the words of the songs, many of which I knew by heart. But they had become rote through the years, and it wasn't until I was going through my divorce that those old words began to have new meaning for me.

But something I noticed was different between the old and the new hymns was that many of the old hymns sang about God-- third person, and many of the contemporary ones sing to God-- first person, and I believe that is significant. Look at the lyrics to Amazing Grace, Blessed Assurance, Standing on the Promises, In the Garden, Shall We Gather at the River, At the Cross; Holy, Holy, Holy; Onward Christian Soldiers, Count Your Blessings, The Doxology, Ivory Palaces, Just a Little Talk with Jesus, Would You Live for Jesus, All Hail the Power of Jesus' Name, Faith of our Fathers, To God be the Glory, Jesus Loves Me, Mine Eyes Have Seen the Glory, He Leadeth Me, and so many more that are written about God. Some exceptions are I Love Thee, Nearer My God to Thee, Love Divine, Just a Closer Walk with Thee, How Great Thou Art, but these are few and far between.

Look at some of the popular contemporary hymns today: Your Great Name, Your Grace is Enough, Open the Eyes of My Heart, Lord; Blessed Be Your Name, Here I am to Worship, I Give You my Heart, You are My King, I Could Sing of Your Love Forever, You are Good, You are God Alone, Lord I Lift Your Name on High, God of Wonders (You are Holy), You Never Let Go, Your Name, You are My All in All, You are Worthy of My Praise, Your Love Never Fails, Draw Me Close (to You), and many more. But there are also a number contemporary third person-written songs, too.

I believe the difference between writing and singing worship songs about God and writing and singing worship songs to God is huge. I think it's the difference between hearsay and first-person account. Too much of my worship growing up has been rote, traditional, repetitious, and not very meaningful. We followed the same routine of singing three or four hymns, taking the offering, listening to special music if someone had prepared something, and then the sermon. I was singing about God and hearing about Him, but for the most part I wasn't personally in the moment praising God and worshiping Him. If I truly was conscious of that, I would probably find myself face down on the floor in awe of Him. I've learned that first person songs help draw me face to face with God more so than the songs that I'm singing about Him. But that doesn't mean I'm for throwing out any third person songs. God uses them, too.

Right now I'm in a church that blends the old and the new, and I think that's the best worship experience. We still have the piano and organ, and two of the most gifted accompanists that can play both traditional and contemporary hymns. And we also have drums, a guitar, a violin, and a trumpet, too. If we do only one type of hymn to the negation of the other, we've denied part of the congregation worship that is meaningful to them. And when you think about it, worship services are primarily for the believers. Most of the evangelism and conversion of non-believers takes place outside of our worship services through relational connections.

There is a place for both contemporary and traditional music in our worship services, and including the old hymns doesn't make us any less spiritual or hip. God still speaks through those inspired songs, too. But the traditionalists should also take note of the messages of the first person contemporary songs, too, and allow God to use them as well.

Ugly, Black, Fuzzy Thing

My daughter Vanessa just about had a heart attack when she looked out the back window at our yellow tabby on the patio.

"Momma! Lincoln's playing with a big tarantula!!" she hollered as she ran out the door to rescue him.

Vanessa was nine or ten years old at the time. The cat nonchalantly batted the tarantula around like a toy, and the big spider kept rearing up at him, trying to be as ferocious as possible. Lincoln wasn't scared at all, but Vanessa couldn't stand it. She ran to Lincoln and jerked him up off the ground, holding him up high as she looked around for the tarantula. I can just see Vanessa looking this way and that, and Lincoln looking down wondering what she was looking at.

For some reason she could not find the tarantula anywhere. She finally turned to look at Lincoln's face , and to her horror, there in his mouth just inches from her own face was the tarantula. The cat must have grabbed him as soon as Vanessa ran up to him, thinking she was after his toy.

With no further thought of rescue, Vanessa shot-put the cat and the tarantula across the back yard. I still laugh every time I picture that in my mind.

Too many times in life, though, people get a hold of things or allow themselves to get into situations that are harmful. It can be very easy to lose sight of the value of these people when all we see are the very things or situations that are hurting them. They may not even recognize the danger to themselves and resent any attempts of rescue. Sometimes the rescuer gets hurt in the process, too, and it becomes easier to discard those painful people from our lives. Other times we completely avoid reaching out to people because we cannot see past the snares that have entrapped them.

On the other hand, harmful things in our own lives can cause us to isolate ourselves from others, maybe to avoid admitting we have a problem and facing it or the shame of anyone finding out something's getting the best of us. Many of these problems began by making wrong choices, but all are symptoms of a fatal heart condition each of us are born with... a heart condition that can only be cured by the Great Physician.

God sees beyond that ugly, black, fuzzy thing called sin we all have been hanging onto at some time or other in our lives, and He loves us anyway. He is not about to throw us away. That choice is ours.